Everything is OK

I mean that. Everything is ok. I've just been doing a bit of thinking. I learned that in order foe me to be really OK, some boundaries need to be set. I can no longer allow people to make me feel bad. Nor can it matter who they are and what they are suppose to represent. I spoke about it at length woth Jo. He always sees things a bit differently and it helps to get that perspective. It was one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make but came to the necessary conclusion that I can no longer allow my parents to bully me and then turn it around to justify their actions say their attitude, behaviour, et cetera is because I did or said something. It actually hardly, ever is, my fault when I have found myself on the receiving end of their need to still put me in place even though I've been an adult for quite some time. I allowed it because of guilt. I was told I'm the only one who can help them, support them, whatever. That is not my fault. They're actions and words are what drive people away. I haven't spoken with them except for a very brief moment at Christmas. I actually feel good. I like it. I like not having to justify my actions or explain why I want to do something. It's actually nice not having someone tell me it's a waste of money or time. I've been enjoying myself and look forward to this new found freedom. I just had to give myself permission to say no and not feel bad about someone else's wrong doings or poorly thought out actions. Boundaries are good, necessary and healthy! I will continue to enforce them.